I just saw a girl play flip cup with only her tongue
I'm in love
you're bored at work aren't you?
I'm toying with the idea of beating off under my desk
The money shot is kinda like the "The End" part of a children's book isn't it?
you spent the like half the night trying to figure out the puzzles on the back of the captn crunch box
I still cannot believe I yelled at every guy at the bar "you wanna get in this clam?!"
Definitely just put my car on cruise control so I could stick my head out of the sunroof while driving to taco bell.
You didn't even properly utilize my pigtails.
Taking advantage of alcohol's depressant capabilities to curtail my fever. SCIENCE!
You know it was a good night when you're lying on the couch in your pjs at 4pm having a pitcher of ice water for breakfast.
he used the hotel microwave to cook the 16" pizza he bought at the walmart deli
He used a "food city great value" card to cut it
You have all semester to unpack your car, quarter jello shots only last until 10.
Uhh I just had to break up with a guy who I didn't even know I was dating...
Hahaha wearing a fake moustache in public was the best idea i ever had
would you eat cereal with weed in it
who is this???
What better than a girl who loves jager, sexts like a champ and is down for t-bell at any hours of the night? oh wait, NOTHING.
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