we are at a mexican restaurant and the tv is playing mexican porn. dad won't stop watching.
Hooked up with 8 guys, puked 4 times, got a few bruises, and my face is still numb... I think this visit has truly impacted my college decision
All I want to do is fuck in the bell tower before it leave this school. Is that too much to ask?
Leaving your birthday party to engage in a threesome IS allowed. I checked the rule book.
Hey, this is Travis. I just so intelligently deduced that I am in a college dorm somewhere in western oregon. Probably WOU, based on the process of elimination.
We watched Jurassic Park and they made me drink every time they saw or named a dinosaur. Do you know how many dinosaurs live in Jurassic Park? Lots.
jen just told me ur idea of revenge was saluting while letting his bong float away while attached to some balloons.
I have fuck me eyes 4/5 people agree. It's like doctors or dentists but with ppl who have lots of sex and know these things.
I have a fantastic sense of humor but being called a merman isn't funny
When we were done he got down next to the bed and I thought he was Tebowing. He was hitting a bong that he had already loaded and hidden under the bed.
strip teases shouldnt end with an expensive car covered in salsa and mayonnaise yet here we are
Woke up with a $50 attached to my penis with a rubber band..
Sweet. Tell little Richard to buy us a sack and a pizza.
Always a gay best friend, never a bridesmaid
Doing a walk of shame at Wal-Mart at 3:30am because when I left at 11pm I was getting milk
It feels weird going to sleep without hugging the toilet goodnight
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