Turns out he's not gay. He just didn't know how else to say he's not into me. He just hit on my sister.
i just spent the last half hour thinking about my totally irrational and intense hatred of wedge flip flops.
He tagged himself in all of my pictures so he would get a notification if someone commented on it.
Restraining orders are what college is about.
We went to red robin and there was a 15 minute wait so we went and fucked in the car. Quickies, endless fries, and a mascot handing out balloons- this is literally the night of my dreams.
they are using this drunk girl like a spin the bottle in the hot tub, whoever she lands on she makes out with.
He offered but I said no. I didn't think it'd be cool to accept cupcakes in the mens room of a gentlemans club.
looking at that huge scar on my leg from when i got drunk at 9 AM and walked into a grill. so excited for football season to start again!
do you think they make 'sorry for walking in on you drunkenly jacking of to a picture of me' cards?
if i got ashes i think they'd burn a hole into my head with the amount of sins i've committed this year alone and it's only february
I have whiskey and jager. There's no telling what kind of monster will emerge
Fuck you, if it wasn't for us going to the city, she would be using me as a human sex toy all day.
Then you're three pancakes deep in regret.
Girl you're stalking so hard you're gonna know both their social security numbers soon
Let's get drunk and take out your tonsils tonight
I swear I only fuck him for the huge bottle of smart water he gives me afterwards.
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