I'm home now. bring me food and boobies
You're the unicorn of the gay community. Unbelievable and unattainable.
I'm drinking early times at a fridays on wednesday night. This entire bar is going to see my dick by last call.
America approved of our night. A bald eagle flew over us at 7am
I seriously might throw up right now. In class. Sunglasses on. I'm getting too old for this.
I feel like his penis would have a weird haircut because he does.
Here's the thing, you got road head in two different cars tonight. You feel lucky yet?
You screamed "I NEED TO GET THE WHOLE SET!" and then proceeded to try touching everyone's balls in the room
I fell in the river last night. The allegheny to be exact. Omg getting drunk at work gatherings is dangerous
GOOD NEWS I CAN BRING THE VODKA IN MY LUGGAGE
You're just a heartbreaker with a knitting problem
I need thought I would ever have to use the phrase "Don't fart on that Calzone".. Thanks for that
I look at it as community service. He was going through a rough time and I gave him an ego boost. That's how we're going to remember it. I was doing a good deed lol
I ACCIDENTALLY SUPER LIKED HIM. I JUST DELETED TINDER FROM MY PHONE.
I made him fuck me while wearing a Thor helmat from Walmart. Geek sex is the best sex
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