i wish we had morning classes together so we can spike our coffee.
1. my parents still have sex. 2. being a screamer runs in the family. 3. so much so that i can tell what number of orgasms she's on. 4.so looks like i'm stuck outside a while
We made the bar tender tell us how he proposed to his girlfriend. In detail. While we made gushing noises. We are embarrassments to females everywhere
thats the 2nd threesome ive been accused of this week
Wise words from the guy who drunkenly chipped his teeth on the sidewalk
Crosswalk actually
mary just dropped the yahtzee dice in her wine. and shes throwin em like shes on a craps table.
hahahaha slap the bag.
The venue for the new years party is close to the hospital for obvious reasons.
how much ball-pain constitutes an emergency?
I remember seeing his penis I just dont know exactly what I did with it
Nope not happening. When I close my eyes the floor moves. I'm going to enjoy this free roller coaster.
That dude with the beard walked up to me, turned my water into wine with everclear and kool-aid, and walked away. Pretty sure drunk Jesus is back.
a large sweaty girl i dont know is sleeping in my bed. A scotish man and a small child looking dude are on the couches im on the floor sleeping and im ok with it
So this is my life now? Laying in bed texting about Hulk penis?
How the fuck did he think me asking about the possibility of a threesome was a rhetorical question?
so.. please tell me you did not really sleep on the washing machine last night
guilty
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