i thought she was just hairy. i didn't know she was also a man.
we turned his baptism video into a drinking game
We had to put his head at the bottom of the driveway so the puke would run down. Now he's sleeping outside.
apparently there was a flour fight and couch sex...
Hey. Be honored that I consider you the genital expert. I know alot of candidates for the position.
Heed the warning of the ghost of Oktoberfest present: German beer is soooooooo much better than our watered down children's piss. also lost all my clothes and am wearing lederhosen the rest of the trip.
Santa brought me a 1.75 of wine, and a liter of patron. I probably won't remember Christmas, so don't ask me how it was tomorrow.
you know it's gonna be a good 4/20 when you start saving up for it in january.
I just tried to text you by typing "whoa" into my contacts.
I'm holding onto the sink for dear life. Pretty sure if Iet go I'll turn into a shit propelled man rocket.
I think we need to have a day of drinking in classes. I know we don't share any, but sacrifices need to be made.
He's super sweet. I feel like I'm dating Elmo. If Elmo had a 7 incher
Yeah, I've hit on priests at bars, too. Such a shame, there are a lot of hot men out there who've devoted themselves and their glorious genitalia to the Lord -_-
I love how fuckboys immediately become cultured when I tell them I’m an artist.
i got my period today. mid walk of shame and im wearing a shirt that says stay classy. my life is a joke.
Randomize
