Was i wearing a white blazer when you superpoke danced me??
you miss my big massive throbbing cock dont you?
Woah.
that's not how you spell hell yes.
you know how you have to have just the right ratio of chips to sandwich? same goes for pubes.
I just went to a subway where the girl didn't know how to make a blt. I will not miss public school texans.
he wanted to have me eat skittles off of his body. he mad gay sex even gayer.
I thought pig tail meant you were suppose to grab on to it when getting BJ
So gin and wine won't be happening again
if u cant get laid at this wedding we need to have a looooooong talk about the possibility of u becoming a lesbian
We played strip Bananagrams and I won. Thank fuck I read a lot as a child.
I have to date her. We need a place to stay when we go tailgating.
Seriously, do normal people actually get work done being this hungover? No wonder the economy's in the shitter
he made a bon jovi sex playlist and started crying when "i'll be there" came on... how was your night?
Oh my god he's laying on a longboard singing the song from cool runnings.
Bring a bathing suit and your good liver.
My good liver is still at the dry cleaners. Will my backup liver suffice?
Maybe
There are both cum and chocolate stains on my sheets. Can't decide whether this is a new low or a new high.
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