FYI-Owning a kitty significantly lowers your chances of ever seeing mine...
i just posted a lake picture of you with a dead fish in your mouth. happy july 5th.
don't look now, but that cross eyed girl is staring at you... and me.
and i'm pretty sure he drank the lava lamp
UPDATE: WE WILL BE HITTING THE BATMAN PINATA WITH A SWORD
What kind of costume was that supposed to be??
I'm an orgasm trader!
It's titled "A countdown to death. A psychological look at the downward spiral of actress Lindsay Lohan and her inevitable Hollywood demise" This dissertation is genius. Not a single sober moment for either Lindsay or myself. Good stuff!
In honor of Sarah Palin's bday I suggest we watch Nailing Palin
Whenever I think to myself, "I don't work for a bunch of hours"... It's shot time?
I GOT JUDGED BY A GUY WORKING AT THE LEAST CLASSY STRIP CLUB. Peeing isn't a right, it's a privilege.
Also, I found your gauge.
I found it under my pillow like a gift from the Sex Fairy.
It's not safe here. I had urgent and violent diarrhea last night, and I got blackout drunk. Please don't come over.
And the next thing I knew I was blowing this random hot italian bartender with an uncircumcised penis in his work closet
He walked into the bar with a pineapple and they served him AND the pineapple
you said it was a life or death situation, being your partner for beer pong doesn't count
Randomize
