420 ftw
i am so fucked up that i think i'm playing snood in my head.
well..are you winning?
I'm about two and a half drinks away from gay.
I'm coming over.
I just found 51 cents in my bed. Did you leave me a tip?
you said "tonight pinky, we take over the world" and then came in my face
You should get a handy in the street again, just to prove you've still got it.
He insists on falling asleep with his penis between my buttcheeks. He says its his "home".
Finishing last nights 1.5L of wine and beef jerky for breakfast. Work looms, ever the prickly bitch.
Cockoligist
Yes, one may refer to me as that.
I should make business cards.
Just high enough for therapy.
I need to shower three times. First to be clean, second to wash off all sins, and third will classify as baptism.
I have really important information for you regarding the furry convention this weekend
Of course i made out w him. He was painted green. You know of my secret longing for the Hulk.
I'm going to book club and then I'm going to get laid. Being in your 20s ain't so bad sometimes.
He's asking how tall I am he wants to make a body suit out of me
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