piano lessons. No girlfriend. What's up.
so explain again why im purple
no
just so you know, the whole club saw your tits last night. and booed.
he kept kneeing me like he was playing footsies... only then i realized it was his dick.
the roller ball on my blackberry is the closest i've come to touching a clit in 2 years.
if only i could text you this smell
it's not like i was drunk to the point of NEEDING help...i just wanted someone to offer to hold my hair or something.
Please hurry up and come back. This is so awkward. He's showing me banana videos.
Yea not today, I ending up taking a shit behind a tree last night.
Sex followed by chicken and waffles... Hands down my favorite morning plans. Count me in.
FYI the blow job was for papa johns pizza
I regret 8000% nothing
He kept trying to make out with me but I was just trying to show him Shrek memes
Dammit. the window insulation sheets are too small for my windows. Yet again I am disappointed by size
I had an awesome dream where you were a stegosaurus and I was a triceratops and we were hiding from a t-rex and had mad dino sex
I WILL go to space. And if we find aliens I WILL fuck one. It’s the Marine Corps way
Randomize