Dude we got so high last night. I said "watch this" threw a goldfish cracker in the toilet, and laughed my ass off. We watched the dvd menu for 30 minutes too.
This is much more drunk than i was intending for a wednesday
They have a pepper shaker for pot.
Guy having heart attack in McDonalds. Classic.
so high i just made my own version of grilled cheese using toast and spray cheese
here comes the puke
Just heard one of my friends say, "if you're trying to take advantage of me I really dont care. I just want this beer." ..
How is it that you get into at least one taco related fight a year?
I have hit nutritional rock bottom I am spreading peanut butter on to lays potato chips
It is officially settled in my mind that fuck the hot grad student is THE goal this year
I think that all guys are assholes, some of them just have less assholeish qualities that we accept in our lives and that we can look past enough to deal. They have to be a pretty special asshole.
He wants Portugal to lose so badly he threw out all the sangria. You know how depressing it is to watch someone dump 4 gallons of heaven?
So, I have realized that I am kryptonite for married men. I'm not sure how to feel about this sober, but drunk me accepts her destiny.
She knew the head wasn't all that so she gave me her taco. I'm will in to give her a second chance.
Im going for myspace 2006 goth bitch. Your worst nightmare
I did not marry a roomba.
Randomize