He seems like he has feelings, which is completely unacceptable; esp for a boy in college.
Since when do you wear a bracelet?
Not a bracelet. Half a pair of handcuffs
Yeah, it was all fun and games until I realized that it wasn't my tent, and I had no idea who those people were
Just so you know, coffee creamer+water does not = milk.
Could someone please kill snooki before she contributes to the gene pool.
A stranger just came up to me and asked why I hadn't texted him, and if he was just a one night stand. I live for these moments.
So... crashing at the hot bartender's place is not a solid marital decision.
She said I had a really great aura. Which I think is hippie code for "I bet you can give me a mind melting orgasm"
You declared that afternoon sex will be referred to as "wet naps" from now on
Adulthood is making your own puke bucket.
Wtf. So apparently this 5 star establishment doesn't allow strip putt putt in the parking lot. We all just got kicked out of our rooms.
We had sex to Hey Arnold, Rugrats, and All That. I feel like my life has come full circle.
I'll do whatever I want when I'm 80.
If you are still alive at 80 I demand a medical explanation.
I JUST WANT TO SIT IN MY UNDERWEAR AND WATCH THE BRAVES GAME AND NOT BE CONSTRAINED BY MY ED SHEERAN SHORTS
Get over your kidney infection all ready. You have been sober for too long.
Randomize
