im trying to catch a child molester. call you later.
this isnt the first time ive seen her dressed as abe lincoln
I spiked my fruit smoothie. Taking bikini season diet to a whole new level
I'm so bored right now i'm literally Googleing all the possible ways to get high with household items as my mom is sitting in front of me..
he's home with a concussion now...but apparently i'm still the highlight of his freshman year
I just yelled at a bunch of girl scouts for yelling "cookies" to loudly. That hungover
This is what we get for YOLOing our way to obesity
It's amazing to think about how many Obama victory sex babies are being prevented by Obamacare free contraception.
I'd cum for enchiladas.
But I REALLY want to hide my crazy for as long as possible with him so he'll date me.
MORE IMPORTANTLY I THINK I JUST WATCHED SOMEONE GET SO LONELY AS TO TURN BISEXUAL??
Did we have sex last night?
No. You laid in my bed and I brought you taco bell.
Listen. You dont know how advanced you are in yoga till you have to shave your butthole
He told me I was a good dog mom. I've never been so turned on in my life
It's weird having sex with someone you actually like
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