It really wasn't that bad. Well, it was pretty bad, but only in 3 second bursts.
It's pretty bad when the convenient store clerk can tell you that you're earlier than usual for visiting the store.
I had sex with him, and then he gave me a $5 Starbucks gift card. Totally worth it
Remember when we were mad at her for brining her mom on spring break? She just won the wet t-shirt contest. I think we owe her an apology.
Want to come to my BBQ and Blow party?
he was shitfaced drunk and couldn't walk but could still recite the top 10 in order from the first season of american idol. impressive
She ate the cookie then went to the emergency room. Now her fam is pressing charges. Don't people understand you DON'T steal baked goods from potheads??
I got asked if I was pregnant as a pickup line
Just watched a drunk girl hand her valet ticket to a cop and walk away.
Febreezed myself at a stop light on the way to the IRS office. Judgmental glare from some old lady in the car next to me, thumbs up from her husband.
There is a special place in Hell for whichever one of you put Ben Gay on my dildo. It was a very uncomfortable April 1.
You slid down a wall, tried to pull your cast off and yelled that casts were too conformist.
I think I just shit out all my problems.
I don't know how it started but we all ended up shirtless andI was covered in crawfish and wearing a sombrero.
She won't let me meet her hot new boy toy just because she thinks it'll lead to us having a threesome. It's not fair. I thought we were friends...
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