Did you read the article making fun of the right wing extremists? How they organized this 'tea party', and to propagate it they would mail teabags to their senators? And it became a verb...they had posters saying 'teabag obama!' yeah...
A message to Mrs Obama perhaps?
My mom just drunkenly told me i was conceived in the back of a car, at a Bon Jovi concert.
She really thought E.D. was a sexually position.
There is NOTHING better than watching a child being chased by an ostrich.
im just laying here pukin in my mouth and swallowing it 'cause im WAY too lazy to actually get up and find a place to vomit. this is my life now.
you passed out while setting up your phones timer to time how long it would take before you to passed out.
Balls deep in an Orange is the New Black marathon. Bring food and drugs.
Just bc you put "its cute" at the end of it doesn't change the fact that u have called me a vag twice this morning and its only 10:03
That's fine. It's not illegal to bring ham into a museum.
Nothing says I love you as your fiancé bringing back home your drunk brother from his own stag party
Nipple rings and loofahs DO NOT mix.
Hung out near hay bales in sweaters then she gave me a pumpkin spice pop rocks bj. That was so freakin' seasonal.
I got her number but I don't think I'll be able to smash, I was pretending to be British AND I forgot her name
Do NOT approach him. He has sex with everything. LITERALLY everything, and I DO mean everything. He's so horny we once caught him with his dick in a pumpkin. A legitimate honest to God pumpkin that he bored a hole in
There is no way entering a gas station bathroom memorializing an alien abduction in rural New Hampshire is a good idea.
Randomize
