I hope my theory books are in my locker, but if not, I guess I can always share with you.
Who said I want to share with you?
You've sucked my dick, I'm pretty sure you don't care if I look at your theory book.
You know the gilmore girls would be alright if it was on mute the whole time
I just did the nutritional comparison between 2% milk and Bud Light Lime.. the beer had less calories, less carbs, and less fat. It's not looking good for milk in my life anymore
Being at this bar with grandma is a real cockblocker
are you aware you chucked your pizza at a girl's face after the bar last night?
It's the first day of summer. It's not a race it's a marathon. Pace yourself
He took shrooms and didn't want anyone to touch him. He kept saying he was a chip and he didn't want to break.
Why did the fire extinguisher taste lemony?
You're always so generous when it comes to your dick.
Well, I saw an Olympian's genitals tonight, so it can't be that bad.
The friend zone. He put me in the friend zone. But said he still wants me to suck his dick. I'm in the dick sucking friend zone and I want to die.
Please remind me next time not to call the ex who cheated on me to cry about the ex who forgave me for putting him in prison. It would be much appreciated.
The housekeeper found my huge dildo under the bathroom sink, and another in the living room. I can't get much more single than this.
DONT YOU DARE YELL AT ME. YOU'RE THE ONE WHO TRIED TO PAY FOR THE CAB WITH YOUR PANERA REWARDS CARD.
Its like a glacier coming out of my asshole.
Randomize
