if i get killed by an online date, its your job to tell my parents that we met at church
you miss my big massive throbbing cock dont you?
Woah.
that's not how you spell hell yes.
Last night i was so high that i came home and did a taste test of every vitamin water and wrote theyre grade down on paper.
Exactly how deep of a burn should you have when you pee before becoming legitimately concerned?
No one goes out in public like that, unless they do anal
i just did my hair and make up to walk our dogs.. I hate being the single roommate
Found my new morning breakfast spot. Hospital cafeteria. Nobody asks questions, they just assume shit went downnn
I think rendering her infertile would be a valid community service project
I don't think my prof knows we've noticed her No Bra Fridays.
My first drink last night was a 2-liter of jameson and coke. So hung over it hurt to put my pants back on
Just got our of the shower. I'm standing naked in front of my open windows cause fuck my neighbors that's why
It's disgusting. He breathes through his mouth and just sounds fat. Plus he chews all loud and shit.
I'm pretty sure your ex of four years just had a baby with some kid and named it after you...
THERE IS A MAN IN THE BATHROOM IN COLONIAL GARB GET HERE
i dunno dude, he took his shirt off and is rubbing jello shots on himself. i think he's done
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