i hope your v-card owns a pair of floaties
just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
Do you feel like you missed out a little from not getting crabs in college?
and then he proceeded to take what he called, a whip cream shower.
I have hooked up with someone in EVERYONE OF MY CLASSES.
That's how you know you deserve to be a senior
Started with us just having a beer. Now Ivan lit a torch to walk to the store, Ben smashed a 26 in the parking lot, and they're throwing broken shot glasses. Fratio Friday is something.
The couch is in the bathroom. I don't understand how that is even possible. I couldnt even fit that shelf thingy through the door. Come help. I am about to pee my pants.
Gong!
YOU'RE MARRIED NOW YOU CAN'T KEEP GONGING ME WHEN YOU GET LAID IT DOESN'T COUNT
I just got woken up by some Christians who wanted to talk about the bible. ways to make a hangover even worse for a thousand trebek
He wouldn't let me ride him with a Ninja Turtles hat on...
There is a 1000000% chance you'll be turned down if you try coming on to me while I watch Star Wars.
I feel like I'm in high school again. I'm completely sober and I just gave some guy a handjob to completion.
he answered his phone during sex and left to go help that drama queen with her latest bullshit. I'm drinking all his vodka. it's asshole tax
Tbh.. I hope he still watches our sex tapes so he can be reminded of what he's missing out
His abs are so defined he looks like a human xylophone.
Randomize
