you can still come hang out if you want
I really don't feel like watching you play video games
The cab driver just finished telling me how leaving community college after one month was the best desicion he ever made.
All i've done since I got back to my room today is take a three hour nap. Like, I even planned to change my pants and haven't even done that yet.
Do you knowwwwww you never ha to pee while lhr on eztacy
Idk. Last year there was an ice luge, glow in the dark jungle juice, and lots of naked people. I feel like I'll get pregnant just thinking about going to that party.
I've been laying here all day wondering why my back hurt so bad and then I remembered last night.... When you pushed me through that glass table.
And your cousins porn shouldn't have been the first straight porn you watched. And for that I am sorry
i have an important question...can you drink in jail?
YOU'RE CHANGING THE SUBJECT. I CAN BLOW SOMETHING UP OR I CAN TELL HIM YOU LOVE HIM, BUT ONE OF THE TWO IS BOUND TO HAPPEN
You're right. I woke up today with my ugly sweater still on and no pants. I'd say it was a successful night.
Totally on the hot mess express last night. Mom said I was passed out on her kitchen floor. Told her I was drinking genuine tea.
the bartender goes "wow its so good to see you sober" and gives me a hug
He described his sex dream about me using only emojis
On a side note. I slept with a stuffed giraffe last night. Found it in my bed when I came home and snuggled with it. Drunk me reverted to being 2
Is it in poor taste to drop acid before midnight mass?
I love this.
Randomize
