I just saw a guy wearing a tuxedo shirt under his overalls. That is true iowa class right there
Well, it's 24 hours till finals. I need high A's on all of them and I still am not sure where exactly on campus most of my classes took place.
you told me heaven would be the 3 of us at Moe's forever and every hot girl that walked in would ask us to play stone face
so according the 72 facebook statuses i put up last night that i don't recall, i would say it was a success. how about you?
The sex I just had was not worth missing a girls night out.
I just passed a drug test. I want to shout that from the top of a mountain. Can we have beers on the top of a mountain?
Its kind of weird knowing that im only seeing you that day to fuck in some woods
Got a minor my first day of college from the bike police. I'm gonna like it here
I just sustained a forearm injury dancing to salt n peppa in my kitchen. Fack. I pushed it real good.
There is nothing wrong with watching parks and rec all day then getting blackout drunk by night
I just watched videos of people getting puppies and crying, I cried too. Definitely still drunk
Went up to some dude that hit on Laura and told him he has a voice like a grandma. Apparently didnt have muscles or kindness like grandma so can you pick me up at the ER please?
It was terrible. I am sore from head to toe, neither of us got off, and we were at it for an hour and a half, I faked having a heart episode so we could stop. It worked.
I may or may not have puked near a bear on the side of the road this morning.
I got home and he was wearing a suit. He said he reason was because it was shirt and tie Saturday and that he won't change until midnight. He then proceeded to answer the door in a British accent.
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