talk about how much treatments for your hpv hurts
If she sucks any more cock I swear she will be a spermivore
new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
In Vegas, have spent the last 48 hours wearing a viking helmet and fanny pack. I consider this to be a career high since drinking is my career
He like poked it twice with the tip of his tongue then left it alone. I'm sad.
Don't play hard to get, I've seen some of the girls you've slept with.
There's a pair of socks on the bar. No-one's questioned this.
you were trying to control your nosebleed while having someone hold your four loko while you drank it through a straw. all at the same time. that is commitment.
I was giving a campus tour, when a drunk senior came up behind me and shouted at the group, "If Jesus ain't your homeboy - get the fuck off this campus!" Looks like his religion course is paying off...
I have officially tracked lube all over our house on the bottom of my socks without knowing it. Don't slip when you come in
My alarm went off and I went straight for your dick. That's dedication.
I was afraid she wouldn't be able keep up but I woke up in a bathtub, she called me a pussy and made me pancakes.
Came home to butt plugs and dildos in the bathroom sink WTF
Spring cleaning
You're supposed to discourage my sluttiness not bring me hot Colombian men
She'd probably like you more if you'd stop fucking her husband.
Randomize
