Just finished my law exam. Questions 4-18 seemed to pertain specifically to things we've done this semester.
how did the keg end up in the top bunk?
See this is what happens when we don't have sex everyday
Is "incoherent" a legit goal to strive for tonight? Or should I stay sober enough to fuck who I can?
He's currently surrounded by roughly 23 girls he fucked and never called. He may not make it out of here. Bar of doom? Or of redemption?
if it doesnt flame it aint got game is a bad drinking motto eyebrow-wise.
eyebrows regrow, your balls dont
Well, he asked what my sign was, then proceeded to critique me on my beer pong stance... I really need to raise my standards.
He said I could stop sending ass pics now and just say hello. I'm not sure if that means he's no longer interested, or that he's a gentleman??
Do you ever get high and look at your cat and feel like you know them on an intellectual level?
SORRY FOR THE CAPS. I DIDNT CHANGE IT IN TIME AND ITS TOO FAR TO GO BACK NOW. PS IM SUPER BAKED
He looked me deeply in the eyes and said "I don't want this to be the last time I see you.. Can I follow you on Instagram"
He fucked the hangover right out of me. That good.
i'll...probably just offer you drugs?
i'll...probably take them in all honesty
I have a bag of frozen peas on my vagina. If you want to talk about real problems.
There were no words. I got in his car, took my pants off, threw my shirt out the window, and got things started. After we were done I collected my clothes, gave him a kiss, and crept back into my house.
You're like the sex ninja. How doesn't he love you?!
Randomize
