There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
So A**** bought my story about how my hickey was a bruise from wrestling
on one hand i'm glad that i'm not in trouble...on the other hand i realized that the reason i cheat on her is because she is so stupid
The walk of shame is slightly more complicated when you wake up in the wrong country...
So if you want this MFM threesome thing to happen the other guy is here and willing
I saw a stripper quit while on stage to months ago nothing you tell me will amaze me
i woke up hungover wearing my gym shorts and the condom from last night. Wine bar thursdays rule.
so i guess now we know you can get away with peeing mere feet from the Capitol if you shout IM PREGNANT at the guards
So I come home yesterday and my brother is like "watch this" and it turns out he's been retraining my dog to come running when u say "anal"
Do you think blood ever gets sick of carrying all these drugs around?
Like, there are so many different things we make it do, and it just wants to settle down and be a one-drug fluid?
Stop reading WebMD high.
But see that's the thing. I know i'm better looking than you, I just want you to be continually in a state of shock and awe that you could ever get a girlfriend this hot. You know?
The only times we have to apologize in this friendship is when you intentionally punch me and that's only happened once so it's okay
I made it 1 week... 5 business days at my new job before sleeping with my coworker.
Im four hours late for work AND i pissed my bed
You have ten minutes starting with this message to get here. Or I'm putting my clothes back on.
My EX’s roommate heard about the breakup and offered to help me bang it out. I think she hates her even more than I do.
Randomize