i wish there was a photo editing effect that fully opened my drunk eyes
The new google images is a smorgasbord of porn now are plans for tonight are off.
While I faked being asleep, he literally prayed to God out loud, asking for forgiveness for losing his virginity before marriage.
At what point in my life did a night that has strippers, belly dancers, tequila and a midget become "average"?
Yeah i'd say someone being in the room while you're doing someone makes them eligible for fb friendship
This is a sacred holiday in the land of the free! I do what I want!
i just came to a realization. Besides probably food, in my lifetime i think i have spent more money on legal fees than anything else
you strike me as the kind of person who when they spill something on their lap they take off their pants and eat it anyways. right off the crotch seam.
He's going to find out eventually, but really what's he going to do? Cry about it and buy another fucking kitten??
It might be whiskey, but I view Marge and Homer Simpson as something to strive for
Nothing too major over here lately. Just had a date with an ex-internet porn star turned lawyer. He said: "at my 3rd burning man I taught a workshop on BDSM" and I knew it was going to be a fun night.
He deserves someone who will touch his penis at 3 a.m.
I came home braless and wearing a tail....
I thought my sex drive was gone but let me tell you it is back with a vengeance
Which sister was it? The one I accidentally hit when my shoe flew off or the one I ate candy off of when we were high?
Randomize
