my penis was classy and tasteful, i don't know what her problem was.
eh.. i should've known it was headed downhill after he used the phrase "pussy sundae"
My gift to the freshman: I made an illegal stop, rolled out and dropped to my hands and knees and puked in front of the south campus dorms and about 20 families. Welcome to OSU
just because you dressed up as a brontosaurus doesn't mean you can poop in my yard and roar at my neighbors
THEY HAVE A VOMIT TROUGH.
What?
A TROUGH FOR VOMIT.
How could you not be happy? Its like "and then I found 5 dollars" but "and then I found a handle of vodka"
drunk taco night MLK would want it this way.
I think I'm going to make a pina klonopin before class.
In less than 3 minutes we had 3 security guards running after us
I told your dad we had a nice lunch and hung out for awhile. It seemed more appropriate than "I had a bite of his canned chili and then we ripped each others clothes off."
My new dealer is 16. I have been getting high longer than he has been alive.
I don't see the problem
he also bled all over my floor. unrelated to cats but true nonetheless.
We also had rum, but now that's all gone. Which I feel is appropriate for a pirate party.
Are u alive? If u are, you deserve an award.
Officially hit an ultimate low today. I was so hung-over I threw up on the ground in front of the jousting display in the London tower. But on a positive note, Brits are very understanding when you vomit on their history.
Randomize