Fuck, operation next sex victim is on as soon as i get back. Do not sleep with that red head, nobody likes accidental ginger babies.
I just saw a commercial that said "call your doctor if erections last more than 4 hours". I said "disgusting" and my mom said "I know, i hate when that happens." Get me out of here.
i just hate vaginas for liking penis's insside them
When you're opening a bottle of tequila with a golf club, it's probably time to stop drinking...
I dig being used for consequence free sex. Not consequenceful sex.
We are NOT roofying him just to get him to pass out so we can build a masive snow cock in his yard.
I'm bringing a flask to the test on friday. If I'm gonna fail at least I can enjoy the experience
Nuts. Absolutely nuts. she just screamed in my face something about not knowing whats happening and then got tackled by a dude
It's total crap. On a side note I watched a porn of 4 guys wrestling in chocolate then messing around with each other. It was like a dream come true
ummm im also counting the $14 dollars I gave the old guy to pay for the cab I called for him to take to the hospital last night as part of ur present.
Cutting up lines with the edge of my birth control packet. Just reminding you this is the person you've CHOSEN to be monogamous with.
He also has scotch. LOTS AND LOTS of scotch. I think you'd like him!
That is always a wonderful personality trait!
hooking up with him was much more fun when i knew in the back of mind we'd get in some sort of trouble for it
I just offered a cat a "drinky drinky" I'd say my night has started
I don't get a "my roommate is fucking you" discount?!
Randomize
