I'm in a strip club that reminds me of a crack house from the 80's.
i learned a valuable lesson last night. sometimes nice girls finish first. twice.
you were grabbing cocks left and right
you literally grabbed sam's dick and said, "who's cock is this?!"
I have a pussy blister if you wanna poke at it with a needle tomorrow...by this text i realize just how strange our relationship is, especially because you're probably excited
I think you mean your blister is filled with pus...atleast i hope
As it would turn out, "jesusssssss" is not the password to enter Faith Chapel's wifi network.
i guess i had fun last thursday night because when i got on the drunk bus this thursday night everyone immediatley started chanting my name and telling me to do a bus flip
whats a bus flip?
idk but apparently i invented it
I woke up this morning to my phone notebook open and written was "reasons why I'm a whore in chronological order" then it listed everybody I've had sex with in the past five months.
successfully started a charcoal grill with 2 shots of everclear and some aluminum foil. i never wanna leave here
There's an official council for his ex boyfriends. They told me they 'look forward to the day I join them'.
Haha crisis adverted. Just told my dad I need to bone this guy. Nbd. He totes understands
But in today's society it's frowned upon not to wear pants in public.
My ladyscape is the envy of many and the shangrila of few. I will display it proudly.
I woke up this morning with 3 phone numbers, a red Chinese New Year envelope with cash in it, and a winning scratcher all stuffed in my bra. I'd say it was a pretty successful Thursday night.
I wish I knew the extent of my injuries before I climbed over the fence. Might have avoided the need to purchase a cupholder for my wheelchair.
You seem like the type to go to a craft sale baked out of your mind. I like you.
mother daughter bonding time. she's helping me make jello shots.
Randomize
