Yeah but my nose is so stuffed if I tried to give him head I'd suffocate
I just saw what sperm look like swimming around. I'm not happy with what you've put in my stomach.
mike has just informed me of all the things he would put in his pussy if he was a woman. this includes door stops, power drills & g.i. joes.
"and then my dad would be all like 'hey mike, where's the remote?'"
I'm looking at pot farms on google earth. Google should be proud I found a real purpose for it to serve.
This guys mom bought us a 24 pack and drove me and 8 others to a frat house... Hello moms weekend.
Got my bloodwork back and my liver is in tip top shape. Apparently blacking out 5 nights a week isn't cutting it, so we've got to step it up until I see that all of my hard work is actually paying off and doing some damage.
yeah, i'm not. but i'm ready for free bjs. it's just hard to find women who will give me a beej while i'm sobbing uncontrollably
Announcement: Given the sad circumstances regarding the death of my dearest friend Chong the Bong, there will be a brief memorial service for him tomorrow evening at 10:30 at my place. After sharing some memories and sending his spirit off to the great bowl in the sky, we will all take place in the commemoration and maiden voyage of his son, Chong Squared, who eagerly waits to meet all of you. High blessings to you all, piece be with you.
I had sex with marker all over my face so I can do just about anything.
No. 70% of the female population would find them attractive. The other 30% are lesbian and even they would appreciate them for their strong bodies and athletic capabilities.
He made me cum via FaceTime, then he made me look at his stock investment charts..
Starting this Monday as I always do
With a desperate plea for help
We had a quickie at work in the office. He walked out before me, and I fell asleep while waiting a few minutes to walk out. Yeah. He's got that change your life dick
You can accomplish quite a bit with a can do attitude and a well placed ice cube.
Lol. I liked you the most when we were banging random girls and trying to tag team everything. You were happier then.
Randomize
