you want my honest opinion? I'm sure refering to her vagina as the "bat cave" was your first mistake.
some guy just got out of his chair quietly. Laid down on the floor and is now asleep in between rows in my lecture hall. He must have had a rough night.
I seriously just caught my 15 year old little sister with a positive pregnancy test coming out of the bathroom. Honest to God.
I have a coat hanger and a baseball bat. Her choice.
This guy just walked into class and first thing he did was grab the garbage can, walk to his desk and say "just in case"
Don't EVER smell your tampon
I've only left my bed to pee and eat nutella out of the jar with my fingers
we've coined the Sunday morning ritual of taking out our puke-filled trash cans as The Trash Of Shame
Today needs to die. The mail delivery guy watched me throw up in my yard while taking my chihuahua out in Christmas pajamas at noon. Low point in my life.
Don't forget ur talking to the master juggler. Remember that time I slept with 3 guys and made them all pay for plan b? Paid the rent didn't I?
he made a bon jovi sex playlist and started crying when "i'll be there" came on... how was your night?
The party got hot, we all started raging, took off some clothes, someone threw me in the shower and we all kept raging. Nude Rager, I was there at the point of conception.
The lady at the Humaine Society gave me her nephew's number because I seem like a loving and caring person.
Does she know that each time you've adopted a new cat in the past year it's because some guy stopped fucking you and you don't want to eat your feelings?
the girl whose rug I peed on is here
well, mom whipped her new boobs out at the dining room table. So yeah you could say we had a pretty casual thanksgiving
Can you dump a guy for having pierced nipples or is that shallow?
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