Well I think that's a good thing that I'm not full of someone else.
it was like fucking the hulk in a smartcar
her night didn't end so well, both of her boyfriends got arrested... together.
I knew shit got real when the pinapple was gone and people were just passing around the core and gnawing on it.
I just saw a fat chick ask the bartender to top her corona off with grenandine cuz she has a "sweet tooth" no that's diabetes fatty
My mom just called me to tell me that i dont have chlamydia. Awkward.
Wait, you seriously DON'T keep vodka in your backpack??!??!?
You can't just take out your bong for hits in public places... That's what pipes are for. You've got to be stealthier.
No, it's okay because this is the city of trees.
YOU'VE ALREADY BEEN BUSTED MORE THAN ONCE. THAT'S NOT A VALID EXCUSE FOR BONG HITS IN COFFEE GARDEN
I went on an adventure and now we have more food.
Well, really we just have fire sauce and cookies. But they're edible.
I mean I just feel if I'm not being fat and lazy then I'm not really being myself
I bet I give better head than any other PTA mom.
Orgasms and cereal.... that's what life's about.
I think I just read the whole internet. Front to back.
You sending me our unborn, unfertilized babies' names is not what I envisioned when you said you'd "drunk text me later".
Where do you think your fantastically immense lady-boner for men in uniform comes from?
Randomize
