I don't know. The next thing I remember we were in the walmart parking lot making out.
about to try to wax my asshole... wish me luck
you were mass sexting so we took your phone away
I'm quite proud of this turning point from one night stands to giving some guy a BJ to fix my car for free.
You need to come over. I cant get her to stop eating honey mustard straight from the squeeze bottle
he's dressed up as pikachu 3 fucking years in a row and gotten laid each time. i don't understand
My meds have diminished my sex drive, this must be what regular women feel like
I can't wait for the day Google doesn't remind me that I got arrested for having 3 shots called 'frog cum' lined up in front of me.
I'm the brains and you're the boobs of this operation.
It's like hey here is one penis enjoy nothing but that for the rest of your life
im mad at you for telling me he ejaculated during "let it go." Thanks for ruining the song forever.
Literally the fucking master of salvaging the possibility of a blow job whilst also crushing somebody's dreams.
I need to sleep so I can die properly tomorrow.
Went home with a guy last night with Taco Bell sauce in my hair and on my pants
he's 22 and listens to dad music. if i hear one more modest mouse song i'll never blow him again
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