why do my parents always seem to be having way more sex than i do?
The sun is out and the snow is finally starting to melt here... Vodka bottles keep popping up everywhere. Guess it's the college version of burying nuts for the winter
dude she was so drunk she thought Jim Joyce made the right call
Im going home to examine my vagina with a hand mirror. wish me luck.
I feel eeeverything like there's a rhythm and everything can be felt w/o ever touching it. And it's beautiful. Sunshine or raindrops it's like orgasming. Everything has a taste.
thank you TLC waking up to a water birth on tv really put the cherry on top of my hangover...
Nice. I ate a jello shot out of a bovine blow up doll's love hole last night
I think I was the only one who knew you were acting like you weren't drunk in public issues discussion this morning. Make sure you thank me in your Academy Award Speech someday.
That shot was terrible
You were like one of those guys at carnivals that spit out fire..... Except it was throw up
American Eric just peed on us from the second floor. Hes now very confused as to why his "toilet is yelling." Send help.
I'm drinking with a guy who apparently blew my dog sitter.
I may be asexual, but I owe you a solid from yesterday. I am a man of my word.
I just jerked him off with one hand while holding my wine glass with the other and watching Congo. I feel like this was a preview to my married life...
He made me spaghetti, gave me wine and I fucked him on the floor, Is that a fair trade of services to you?
shit i just threw up on a freshman
i don't know if i should laugh or feel bad..
nevermind it was a sophmore, laugh.
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