we have pet lesbian snakes
yeah it was kind of like, i'm 27 and still live in a frat house.. you honestly expect me to have "moral fiber" and a "conscience"
Only in Montana can you find Septic Services that would display "Christian owned and operated" on the side of the truck. I'm oddly going to miss this state.
I know we had a good night last night because his turtle was half asleep chewing on the used condom.
Birthday Coupon: This text is good for alteast 3 hours of Birthday Sex. Redeamable any time, anywhere, and any style.
the lighter is IN the bong. I don't know what to do
It was her first time with a girl so I put on my tegan and Sara playlist to really get the full experience.
The pride tent is doing free lube tastings. There is also a mechanical bull.
I called my dad at 3 a.m. because I thought he'd be proud that I didnt get arrested. Daddys little girl at her finest...
Know what was probably a bad idea? Using white wine as a mixer for vodka.
I have so many plans for this weekend and sobriety is not invited.
Is 36 too old to fuck a college student? THIS IS BOTH IMPORTANT AND TIME SENSITIVE
Just heard him in the middle stall. Sounded like someone emptied a toolbox into the toilet.
They are like untrained puppies reaking havoc on a newly furnished house. Out of control.
You just compared our vaginas to a newly furnished house...I can dig it.
I bought two pregnancy tests and a cosmopolitan magazine at 4am... I told the cashier "dont judge me, ur not God"
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