I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
i dont know whats so great about being respectable.
Dude it was awful. I woke up with more strippers in my dorm room than those duke lacrosse kids.
well you haven't lived until you've been 86'ed from a family restaraunt
its 4:30 pm. In the mall. Just threw up into my hands. I love Vegas and Vegas loves me
His dick was as big as my arm. Giving him a handjob was like giving someone an Indian sunburn.
i feel like god sat there all night pointing and laughing at me
He came up to me looked at my tits said they were huge, rated them a 7 and then asked if girls really do masterbate. To make it better, he put his hand up to my face and said his penis is longer than my face...
We don't watch enough power rangers
I'm gonna take a nap by the fireplace and pretend like I know what day it is.
I'm just now starting to feel better... I remembered sleeping on the floor. I was peeing and saw his rug and it looked so comfy
Babe, Have you see my pants?
Try Jay street in Brooklyn.. that's where I last remember seeing them.
Why did I not realize how important my fridge was till I was drunk. It keeps all my food cold its like my own cold box
My last Google search was 'can an impotent man have sex'. I don't even want to know what I did with that guy.
I resent the implication of a jizz addiction
Randomize
