We're like a lot better than the average bears
I'm not conventionally pretty...I'm just crazy
My clean wipe streak was ended today by two enchiladas and a can of refried beans. dammit i should have been more cautious. thanks for all ur encouragement and support.
i knew she was high when she broke up the cookies into her glass of milk and ate it like cereal
I don't care. I'm going to fuck John's friend and it's all your fault.
We almost died tonight..we almost die every night. but tonight was the closest by far
it's been dubbed the summer of antibiotics
Ok well I'll be up all night studying if you need a wake up call or a place to put your penis.
I just wrote "where Jason is" on the screen. He guessed "hospital" correctly.
We had fun with our Indiana Jones role-playing until I whipped myself in the dick with my belt.
I caught myself flirting with clients today. Someone needs to take me to pound town before I self destruct. This is a code red. I repeat code red.
Jailed a totally belligerent hot guy. That was probably my most thorough pat down. Ever.
I was driving around a golf cart with a keg in the back before I got caught by the cops. First slow speed chase ever
Well I thought I saw everything and then I saw Christmas themed poop bags at Petco.
Got upgraded to First Class and now I’ve got the whole Pacific Ocean to seduce the very hot gentleman sitting next to me!!! Door closing, wish me luck!
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