Trust me, I wear more condoms than socks. I wouldn't risk infecting my cock. It's my livelyhood.
it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
The walk of shame isn't so shameful when you do it in a stolen, autographed Favre jersey.
Ughh on my way to the bathroom now... literally just puked on myself and cleaned it off with a hot dog bun... I love tailgate
High as balls & about to be tanning. Helloooo 15 minute vacay.
Going abroad, it was like my vagina was in a candy store... a sweet sweet british candy store
it was either a really good one night stand or a really really good first date. thank you online dating
Im celebrating the fact that the one guy who has ever denied me has just come out of the closet
I am going to borrow your water/shock proof video camera for St. Pattys day so that if wake up next to the highway again I know why.
Ok but I hold the right to any footage of you getting slapped, puking, anything with body shots, and allowed to make a montage of it to put on youtube.
I THINK I JUST JOINED A GANG. PLEASE PICK ME UP.
holy fuck man...it feels like I got beat the fuck out of by death's baseball bat...chimichangas?
Dude, all I know is that I came out of this thing wearing a snorkel mask and completely covered in glitter and soap.
WHAT HAS MY LIFE COME TO I'M MAKING A SCARF FOR A PENIS
she said. She was going to, and I quote, "put her vagina inside my dick".
Still had our rainbow strip poker new years tradition. End of night we were only wearing mask.
Did you get the usual surprise pics from the strange straight you like to sprinkle in.
Randomize
