I just did your MASH and your life is pretty unfortunate. Youre marrying the tech guy for love. you live in a shack and you're a hooker and you make $1 a day. you drive a brown limo and you have 7 kids
Pregaming class all semester has made this final review session more like my introduction to the topic.
do you know how hard it is to pee with a pumpkin in the toilet ?
it felt like i was a kid in an empty playground. i fucked him on every piece of furniture in the house and then when his housemates showed up i was naked in his bed like i'd been there all along.
We used a lit joint as a candle for her birthday cake
Fair enough. I'm gonna finish off half a bottle of Brunettes in the shower anf relive the good ol' days. We need a reunion
Go for it! You're young. Have fun. Be somebody's expensive hobby like Anastasia Steele.
Just drove by where I lost my sausage gravy virginity
He offered me handsanitizer after a hand job, you can't tell me he's not perfect!
SO AWKS THEY ARE HAVING A COUPLE FIGHT AND I JUST WANT PIZZA
No. DON'T DO IT. Friends don't let friends fuck clowns.
I just did a walk of shame on my own block. one of the old neighbors saw and greeted me "good morning, girl next door"
Apparently the guy with the moaning gf that lives above us is in my DES class... AWKWARD
i gave head in a cab last night. get on my level.
Last night you were throwing up in my toilet singing "all by myself."
Randomize
