Alls I know is that his gf looked like Beyonce and he looked like Babar
Dude, it's gettin so bad even my fantasies just wanna be friends.
Wow, im gonna be a great doctor..."hi let me save your life but first check out this pic of me deep throating a handle of grey goose"
Yeah man i woke up and only had a Jimmy John's wrapper covering myself..
Yeah haha but we have no idea where his keys are. Last night was awful. Him and Chancey were in a fully embraced bro hug at one point. Both crying.
The brazilian leg lock that the stripper put me in was definitely the highlight of the night
MY FUCKING CAT JUST GAVE BIRTH AND IM FUCKING STONED AND I FUCKING DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO!!!
Dude for real though, we gotta stop getting hammered and kissing gay guys.
So it was all good until she started grabbing my beard and telling me to "roar little lion"
like I licked Molly off a boys palm last night at a bar I think its ok to eat chicken once a week
Not entirely sure how I got drunk off 2 mimosas but here I am
its the 14th virginity that counts the most anayways
gave out my moms phone number instead of mine last night... thattttttttttttttt dunk.
there are LEGIT cum stains on my ceilling. ON THE CEILLING!! you tell me how the relationship was.
So...I'm pretty sure I have officially determined that reverse cowgirl is the only position possible to have sex in my smart four two
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