We argued about the championship during sex. Absolutely the manliest moment of my life.
How long after st. Patrick's day is it ok to shit green before I should seek medicial attention?
The usual. Woke up on a dog bed with peeps and $11.
Dude, I fucked her last night with nothing but my bandana on. Like straight Indian chief style.
You yelled "hold my dick" before you tackled the guy away from the dj and two random girls moved to actually hold it, then argued about it. I want that whore aura!
He's a forty-something balding gay man with no boundaries or sense of social norms. Of course we should befriend him.
I needed to do something spontaneous, and since no one had coke this was the next best thing.
You gotta pick a side. My suggestion: side with tits.
Thank you for FINALLY joining the Slutasorus Rex club in this conversation.
She had an asthma attack and had to stop but insisted on getting me off. It's official she's the one
It's a sexual break up. We maintain a friendship and leave any and all sexual attraction out. It's not hard, having a baby is harder than that.
I'm 2 weeks in to my all dick and carb diet and so far I've lost 2lbs.
How do you explain to your kids that you met their mother well you were giving her a gynecological exam??
I mean it's up to you where you want to sleep but I'm telling you you're going to hear us have sex no matter what room you're in.
Fair enough
You can now call me Rabbi, and I can now perform weddings, funerals, and other services in all fifty states. You're welcome, world.
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