So im pretty sure the object of my emotional onterest is tired of playing with me....
Call meee
Ok, but just to warn you, I'm as drunk as a Kennedy right now...
laying in bed listening to christian music, jealous of the hope they have for their life. also need to beat off, can i think about you?
so today I found out that she used to be a he....
are you gonna get a divorce?
The way I see it, if i don't fail the midterm and blow off some of the projects, how else am I going to get motivated to study for the final ?
i am already firmly committed to doing irish carbombs w/ 12 different people, and the st pattys day party doesnt start for another 24 hours. i may die
i just heard her through the wall saying "not on my face! NOT on my face!" then a scream and "I SAID NOT ON MY FACE!!!"...nice work dude.
No more tipping the bathroom attendant with your phone.
She got stuck in the front door. She never told me how or why.
Why do I have a vague memory of your entire fraternity climbing in through my bedroom window?
Summers almost over and we haven't golfed, got naked or had sex yet. Let's do all three in one day, no particular order.
It's astonishing how many Ludacris lyrics you know
Strip Simon Says: DO IT
She gave me a collar. When I asked what this was for she replied "I'm taming your dick"
Tonight I totally got eaten out in the old school photo booth in the mall. Will send you pics of the photo reel asap
Randomize
