jackpot. dress really slutty so he knows you mean business
Instead of asking if I had a condom she literally said " I'm not on the pill but I'm pro choice... your move"... I'm in love
Seriously, it was like sucking my thumb.. and im not even saying that to be spiteful b/c he is a really nice guy.
All semester I have been trying to figure out if this kid in front of me is gay. His cell phone just went off with Britney's "Circus". Case closed.
This girl just stopped in the middle of a sentence because of my blue eyes. She said she got lost in them. I am laying pipe tonight.
I've never heard of anyone celebrating the holidays with a fuck buddies family before.
....I'll be expecting my trophy when I return.
dude, you were feeling up her boob for 20 minutes in front of the guy she was hitting on because you and her had an argument over who had bigger boobs.
hey man, it was for science okay.
THERE IS A VIDEO OF DMX SINGING RUDOLPH THE RED NOSE REINDEER
I'm officially in the Christmas spirit
I'm in the fetal position watching the little mermaid and trying not to die. When do you come home?
You just sat there for two solid hours staring at your monitor and every five minutes screamed "LEGOOOOOS"
are you just sitting in your hotel room drinking popsicle vodka?
.....well anything sounds bad when you say it like THAT
ANIME MEN ARE MAKING ME QUESTION MY SEXUALITY AGAIN
It's not a walk of shame if you run
You reached new levels of laziness. After we woke you up to take shots with us, you stayed in bed so you didn't have to move when you were drunk and sleepy
5 am booty call not ok. The fact I actually went over definitely not ok. My vag needs to learn some control.
Randomize