She acts like you when your on meds
She acts like batman?
Im making the walk of shame with half a box of pizza, its like when youre little and you get a goodie bag leaving the party
he said I was the best sex he's ever had, handed me a burger king crown and told me to take my walk of shame with pride
My walk of shame was far more interesting today. He's moving and was cleaning out his apartment, so not only was I carrying my clothes, I also walked away with 4 bottles of cheap wine and a jar of ragu.
Uhg.. This isn't fair. I just want to have sex with you until i lose consciousness, wake up and start over... is that so much to ask?
I would ask why there is a chair tied to the door of the fridge.. but I am not sure anyone knows the answer.
I want him to be the Hulk to my Brooke Hogan this Halloween. Can I ask him to be my daddy this weekend?
Only if you say it like that.
I hope my orgasm sounds aren't secretly that bad and no one tells me
How does this dude know what a dying walrus sounds like? That's the real question
i ate a whole tub of butter with my hands last night. don't tell me about rock bottom
I'm going to pound you from behind over a table at the bar while I pull your hair and call you a whore...please pass along that message to Rob
I just picked up a hitchhiker so karma will be on our side this weekend. Hahahahahaha
No.
I think girls have an advantage in chugging contests. We know how to just open our throats.
So it's official the pockets of my work apron exist solely for the purpose of secretly flipping off asshole customers and not losing my job.
he looks like the poster child for myspace how the hell does he have other hoes?
I'm on a walk of shame carrying YOUR pants. You owe me.
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