he told me it was a naked video of him so i opened it. i just got rickrolled while sexting
I am watching the CFL at a Hooters in Texarakana. I made a poor life choice at some point that led me here.
we were canoeing in the lake and i asked if he was too drunk for this, and he said "don't worry about it, i'm half native american"
Please make the clown in the corner stop judging me. I mean he's the one with paint on his face. I don't need him judge judying me.
They knew I had a party because the refrigerator settings were different, but they don't notice that we installed a new toilet seat so it's okay.
Turns out the average person our age has never run from the cops. Life: we're doing it right.
So I woke up really sad and then I looked in the cabinet and there was weed and now I'm not sad anymore
At one point I had two blunts in my hand and had no idea where they came from.
I'd like to buy a season pass to your dick please.
Have you ever wondered if we are just made up characters in someone's head? You'll have to forgive me right now I think I have 7 thumbs
WTF ARE YOU DOING IT'S FUCKING VEGAN COFFEE IT'S MADE WITH NUT MILK YOU'RE NOT A FUCKING SQUIRREL.
I think I came out of my blackout as I was ordering wine from the private wedding reception.
I. Love. Skype. Sex.
I think it's just been too long since actual dick has been inside you that you only THINK you love skype sex
I tried to fuck you in my bathroom while my parents were in the next room. I am a clusterfuck of fun.
That has got to be a joke. No human eats that much grass and lives to tell the tale.
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