How's tricks little girl?
Trix are for kids, old man.
get your tongue out of his mouth and answer your phone. if your not doing more than making out i'm gonna be so pissed. i'm about to sleep in your car bitch
shit is crazy. i just keep thinking that this kid growing inside Emily used to live in my balls.
just found my calculator watch from 6th grade. the hipster transformation is complete
I'm pretty sure this all started when I found a vibrator in my mom's sock drawer and had my first orgasm when I was ten...
The only comparison I have for the iPhone is that it's like youre constantly getting a blow job
Bering your kids um. Abiout tol. Throw up
You can drink as much as you want but it's not gunna make her forehead any smaller
I was hoping it might at least fix her teeth
I meant to thank you again for giving up a potential interracial threesome to come to my party. I'm glad you stayed!
All three of them were helicoptering their dicks to persuade me to take my thong off
Who was the person who brought the rooster when they won @ beer pong
I don't know if should be sitting on a toilet or kneeling in front of it
You had 10 drinks. On a first date.
I just masterbated then started bawling.
I need a guy who can see in me what the lesbian community sees in me
Did I see you at the bar last night?
Yes. You just kept grabbing my boobs and saying how much better they are than yours...
You ruined the universe
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