either fucking kiss her or kick her ass to the curb. Either way I can hear everything you are saying
So I'm at the Chevron by your house. I need a condom and a couch.
Together?
Preferably.
i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
My New Years Resolution was to get a girl I dont know pregnant. 8 months later I can check that off the list..
I was totally going to sleep with him, until he got naked and started swinging around his boner singing "I'm so hard. oh yeah yeah yeah, I'm so hard" like Rihanna.
The only way I could have failed my exam worse is if there would have been a drug test portion
GET THE DICK OUT OF YOUR MOUTH AND CHECK FACEBOOK.
You handed some guy a spoon you found, he yelled SPOON GAME, and then the two of you spent the next 20 minutes throwing spoons all over the kitchen.
The polaroid of me taking a test-tube of Jegar out of the gay guys mouth pretty much explains my trip to Spain.
since when did our medecine drawer and our sex drawer become the same drawer? we now have lube covered cough drops.
You need to get over here. I think the drunks are about to sacrifice a chicken to the beer gods. Or a freshman. Stay tuned.
You're right. I woke up today with my ugly sweater still on and no pants. I'd say it was a successful night.
I'm very impressed by your ability to explain a story about your fiery snatch solely in emojis. props.
My liver is screaming fuck you right now.
long story short... we may or may not have lost your car.
Randomize