So I have to ask... did I meet your lumberjack expectations? I mean, minus the red flannel and all.
the only thing i have to deal with now is the fact that i'm still wearing spandex shorts from last night
You're perfectly engineered for doggy style
My roommate just called. He's in Miami and has no idea how he got there. He also has a ticket to Buenos Aires that he can't explain. I figured you'd have the explanation.
Rubbed one out while on hold to buy tickets to Disneyland. Feel simultaneously like a freak and strangely productive.
apparently he thought telling me 'the weasel wants to come out to play' would somehow convince me to go down on him
Don't let the fact that shes seen my penis discourage you
You scratched my dick last night. It deserves an apology and I fell that actions speak louder than words when it comes to apologies like this.
Using the salt from a pretzel bag for tequila shots. Come over.
just saw someone in just a bathrobe not even tied shut run to the bathroom with a facefull of cum. Someone had a good night
I told him that his face would look perfect between my legs. One of my most successful strategies yet.
Jäger goes great with personal crises and receding morals...
I just saw a kid on iowa campus story that looked like the guy i made out with on spring break.
Thinking about licking your asshole. And hugs and stuff too I guess.
I JUST NEEDED TO TELL YOU I JUST FUCKED TWO BOYS IN THE SPAN OF LIKE THREE HOURS AND ONE OF THEM WAS MY SISTERS PROM DATE FROM HIGH SCHOOL IM LOWKEY BOTH PROUD AND ASHAMED
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