I cant take that shot because i want my penis to stay hard.
My little brother has some high school girls in my pool, it's like a jailbait buffet in my backyard
if you take his cock out, you have to give him a bj. it's like giving a moose a muffin.
is it bad if I use the term bowl as a measurement of time, as in how long it takes to smoke a bowl?
We videoed ourselves having sex... I now know why I close my eyes during sex
At what point are you a chubby chaser or just desperate for sex?
Theres a live mouse in the toilet. Goddamn you this is why I don't party here
you put your hands over the taxi driver's eyes and shouted GUESS THE WAY TO THE CLUB
He said he would pay my bar tab if he couldn't answer my question. He lost to the age old question of our youth. Why did pogs go out of style.
Most people would probably take his lack of responses as a queue to stop. But nope, not me. I just keep going. And that's why I don't have a bf, just a little weinered friend
Right now Tom has the 2nd floor office bathroom under siege. He shit/clogged one toilet, and he's throwing up in the sink.
I'm pretty sure the guy who was grinding on me while I was trying to get a drink at he bar was one of my tinder matches
Did I try to sell your body for chicken tenders last night?
My bed smells like the plague
I’m torn. She’s crazy - like legitimately “Wear your skin as a suit” crazy. But her blow jobs and dirty talk are Pornhub quality!
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