If facebook stalking was a job I would totally pown it
yeah worst sex in my life. plus i think her little brother was in the room.
That girl would be great looking if she lost 1000 pounds and cut off her head.
dude this girl next to me farted in the middle of a quiz and denied my high five
bitch
Arguably, the best part was cockblocking those squirrels.
When she can manipulate the direction of her leg hair, you know its time to leave
There is tupperware vodka. thats right tupperwares full of vodka. best leftovers ever
Well I'm 85-90% sure that he licked syrup off my body, but no guarantees...
he called us the olsen twins. we also rapped ignition much to his dismay.
I was going to make out with him...then he licked syrup off the kitchen floor.
Also, I guess I made friends with the guy who caught me peeing behind a bush.
All I know is I drank too much, danced too little.. yet somehow woke up on the floor in the arms of some cowboy.
Go forth my friend, but don't do any of that fruitful and multiplying shit.
And the last thing I remember was you in the bed with the german guy screaming "wrong hole" I laughed n passed out
Woke up to find my underwear in my purse to only remember I took them off at the airport
Randomize
