wow. When I'm done with him he's going to have to pop his collar in necessity and not just douchery
How wet are you?
Ever heard of a U-boat?
Does he know anything about your personal life besides what you look like without clothes on?
the spit in my mouth is still 99% not mine.
the only thing i remember last nigh is talking to some chick for thirty minutes about cheese.
We are lost. Everyone is drunk and it all went downhill after we iced the bus driver.
I'm covered in pickle juice. Why do you people leave me alone?
This is the time you want your cat to have telepathy with you. To know if the guy downstairs left.
All she was asking was for you to describe your coat so she could get it, but you kept yelling at her so the security threw you out.
I'm also 95% sure I had a conversation with someone on how hard it would be to jerk off with out opposable thumbs
I think I'm still drunk and I think you were in my dream (sadly, it was not a sexual bill murray one).
do you think this outfit says "I maintained my dignity this weekend"?
I'm on day 4 of clean eating. I call it the "whore by June" program
He said he wanted to sit next to the fountain so he could "watch the water hit the other water".
2015 is a year for health and mental stability and alas we are not yet there so yolo
Randomize
