I swear she didn't look like that last week.
After I made out with her she fell asleep and started pooting in her sleep. Are we sure lesbians are hot? Cause that wasn't.
Gentlemen...shes not going to tie her self to the table...
I'm proud of our boobs and what they could potentially achieve in life.
Pretty certain he passed out for a while going down on me. Absolutely certain he passed out during the blow job.
i'm about to rub a glazed donut on my face just so it feels like you're here
the good news is that i vommed the last of my humanity last night.
welcome to the club.
BRILLIANT IDEA: In honor of summer olympics we need to start a synchronized drinking team.
We fucked on shrooms. It's like his dick was a beam of light and when I came I turned into a prism and my orgasms were made of rainbows.
At this point i guess a traditional, non-life-threatening pity fuck is too much to ask for
Because I'm a hot mess throwing up in the litter box
Honestly I don't even have room for feelings after that Taco Bell
I'm trying to cause a divorce, your hooking up with a felon, I think we need Jesus.
Things could not have gone more poorly if I had stripped naked and run through the Sahara with sirloins tied to my vagina.
Dude. I just got a visual of u climbing over a bathroom stall to save my life.
Randomize
